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Bed-wetting a misery, but not a criminal act

Trudy Alduk Montville

Publication: The Day

Published 03/17/2010 12:00 AM
Updated 03/17/2010 04:36 AM

Shame on Katrina Gathers for perpetuating the myth that bed-wetting is controllable. ("Good parenting means creative discipline," March 12.) Lumping bed-wetting with stealing money from parents keeps the idea going that a child (or adult) can have a conscious effect over what happens during sleep.
One thing we do on the road to maturity is learn to control bodily functions. In many children the biological switch that prevents involuntary release of urine during deep sleep doesn't develop until later. Sometimes it's 4, sometimes it's 14.
But no child wants to wake up wet and chilly with pj's and bedding sticking to them. More disturbing than physical discomfort is the shame. Children are terrified that others will learn this happens. The child Ms. Gathers wrote of probably slept with one eye open to ensure it didn't happen. In the safety of his own bed he fell completely asleep, which is when bed-wetting occurs.
Bed-wetting can happen daily, or occasionally. Stress can cause a child to start wetting. There are products to help. Talk to your pediatrician. Love your child. Being fearful and ashamed of what happens during sleep won't give a child a good sense of self-worth. Bed-wetting is a misery, not a crime.

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