Bridge - March 18

When I watched today's deal at the club, East was Grapefruit, for whom the end justifies the meanness. He badgers partners unmercifully.

Grapefruit's queen won the first spade, and his king also won. Unable to find another spade, Grapefruit tried the jack of hearts. South won and started the diamonds, and after West took his two aces, South claimed.

"Thanks, partner," Grapefruit scowled. "If brains were trees, you'd be a twig."

"What could I do?" West frowned.

GETS IN

"Nothing," said Grapefruit. "But a player who had two brain cells to rub together would overtake my king of spades, lead the nine to force out the jack, and cash two spades when he took the ace of diamonds."

I don't know which is worse, Grapefruit's demeanor or his analysis. If South held J 3 2, A K Q 6, K 10 9, K 10 4, overtaking the second spade would be costly. The defenders' best chance is for East to play the king on the first spade, then lead the queen to show a doubleton. West could guess what to do.

DAILY QUESTION

You hold: S A 9 8 6 4 H 8 5 2 D A 6 4 C 7 5. Your partner opens one heart, and the next player passes. What do you say?

ANSWER: Raise to two hearts, confirming an eight-card fit and limiting your strength quickly.

If instead you bid one spade and partner tried, say, two diamonds next, a bid of two hearts would suggest only a doubleton heart and might cause partner to misevaluate. If you held A Q 8 6 4, 8 5 2, A 6 4, 7 5, you'd temporize with a response of one spade.