We've all heard about the caged chimp who throws his own, ah, waste at zoo visitors. Two things about that: the chimp doesn't continue to throw, ah, waste for 60 minutes and, also, zoo visitors presumably didn't pay $85-$150 for the privilege of dodging it.

Such were the anthropological issues at play Sunday night in the MGM Grand Theater at Foxwoods when Charlie Sheen appeared on part of his Laxative of Truth Tour - or whatever it's called. By now, based on mostly bad reviews of the several dates thus far, which consistently indicate Sheen has no real plan or concept for these appearances other than to show up and "wing it," we as consumers have essentially been forewarned.

And yet, though Sheen himself offered disjointed and meandering metaphorical waste based around his winning and tiger blood catchphrases, a late-breaking twist in the tour's concept sort of saved the day.

Comedian Jeffrey Ross - noted for his Comedy Central roasts - appeared about 30 minutes into Sheen's odd filibuster and actually roasted Sheen. It was very funny, and Sheen responded with gracious and apparently sincere amusement.

First things first, though. The theater was mostly full - who knows how true rumors were that a large number of seats went to casino regulars - and the demographics were surprisingly varied. Sure, there was plenty of the sort of NASCAR stereotype in attendance, but some of the folks clutching their $35 Sheen T-shirts or tour programs could well have been your obstetrician or accountant or the hip-hop act next door.

And there was a pleasant buzz of surprise when Sheen actually appeared onstage only 25 minutes late. After a short video montage of violent film clips, he began to pace the stage and talk. His pet guitarist, who provided odd riffage throughout the evening, was also in attendance. Who knows why?

Sheen joked that Foxwoods was built on an Indian burial ground, suggested that the crowd was so kind he should confine the tour to just Foxwoods - and dropped F-bombs like the carpet assault on Dresden.

For the record, when I departed for deadline purposes after 70 minutes - and apparently 10 minutes before the show ended, Sheen used derivations of F-ness 86 times. I counted to keep myself awake.

When Ross came out, we all had fun - though it would have been easier to pay $35 the next time Ross comes to town. Most of his remarks about Sheen were unprintable, but among them:

• "Charlie, you make your father ashamed he shares the same fake last name as you."

• "I'm used to roasting classier people than you. Like, Flavor Flav and Courtney Love."

After the roastage, Ross stayed onstage and assumed a moderator role. A Goddess came out - there's only one; Sheen said the other left in the dead of night - and then they got 10 audience members to come onstage and ask Sheen a question.

None of the questions were interesting, though one woman bared her breasts and managed to resurrect some momentum as the session continued interminably. Finally, fans back in the audience and with Sheen and Ross seated again, the comedian read a lengthy text message of encouragement to Sheen from filmmaker Michael Moore.

It was actually thoughtful but put the crowd in a snore. Sheen said it was "awesome." People began to leave. Me, too.

r.koster@theday.com