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Idle Thoughts, while waiting for Jeter's MVP season, March Madness and for someone to explain curling:
• Mr. Idle, Mr. I to his close friends, remains amused at the narrative that it's some foregone conclusion Jennifer Rizzotti succeeds Geno Auriemma one day at UConn.
Has anyone else noticed Rizzotti's team is 9-15 this season?
Or that her teams at Hartford have finished third in the tepid America East for the last two years?
And she's a layup for the UConn job … why?
• One of The Day's omniscient social commentators recently turned Mr. I's fabulous column on college wrestling into a referendum on Title IX.
Title IX is bad, apparently, because it espouses the intolerable concepts of women and equal opportunity.
Sayeth the social commentator: "The United States no longer medals in gymnastics or wrestling because they can't get the training in college."
U.S. Gymnastics medalists from 2004 in Athens, 2008 in Beijing and 2012 in London: Jason Gatson, Morgan Hamm, Paul Hamm, Brett McClure, Blaine Wilson, Guard Young, Alexander Artemev, Raj Bhavsar, Joe Hagerty, Jonathan Horton, Justin Spring, Kai Wen Tan and Danell Leyva.
U.S. Wrestling medalists from the last three summer games: Henry Cejudo, Terry Brands, Coleman Scott, Lincoln McIlravy, Brandon Slay, Jordan Burroughs, Cael Anderson, Jake Varner.
Just remember: The United States no longer medals in gymnastics or wrestling because they can't get the training in college.
If "Talking Out Of One's Tailpipe" becomes an Olympic event, The Day has unwittingly spawned a number of gold medalists.
• If Helen of Troy married golfer Kevin Na, divorced him for Minnesota politician David Hann and divorced him for former NFL wide receiver Hank Baskett, that would make her Helen Na Hann Baskett.
(Ooooh, Mr. I loves that one).
• Mr. I would like to know why Nikolai Volkoff has yet to sing the Russian National Anthem at the Sochi Games.
C'mon. Was wrestling ever better with Volkoff and the Iron Sheik tag teaming?
• Several times last week, NBC failed to identify the attractive woman sitting next to Putin at the opening ceremonies.
Let's just say Vladdy appears to have outkicked his coverage.
They could have gone to commercial with "Is She Really Going Out With Him," if, you know, they had a sense of humor or anything.
• Koji Uehara: 39 years old on April 3.
David Ortiz: 38 years old.
Remember, though: The Yankees are the only team with old players.
• Begging here.
Need a shot clock in boys' and girls' basketball in Connecticut.
• OK. So Albania's athletes were introduced last week at the opening ceremonies.
And all Mr. I could think of was "Cheers."
"Albania, Albania, you border on the Adriatic … "
• Felt bad for Malcolm Smith.
Wins MVP of the Super Bowl and all he gets is a Chevy Pickup.
What, he's spending the offseason in Jewett City?
Don't give him a Beamer or anything.
• Has Mr. I mentioned yet that Jeter remains the best shortstop in baseball history?
• Note to the Connecticut Sun:
Mr. I (Chiney) has not given up (Ogwumike) his crusade to (Chiney) perfect subliminal (Ogwumike) messaging.
• Finally, many thanks to Vinny Marceau and Tony Valero, two members of the Ledyard High School maintenance staff.
Vinny and Tony built The Day its own broadcast table at Standish Gym for our basketball webcasts.
They also make great coffee.
This is the opinion of Day sports columnist Mike DiMauro.