New London — Paula Clifford Scott lost both her daughter and granddaughter on Sept. 11, 2001. The Mystic resident was living in New London when Ruth McCourt and her 4-year-old daughter, Juliana, died aboard the United Airlines jetliner that crashed into the World Trade Center's south tower.

Ron Clifford, McCourt's brother, escaped from the lobby of the World Trade Center after the planes, one carrying Ruth and Juliana and one carrying Ruth's friend Paige Farley Hackel, crashed into the two towers within minutes of each other.

On that day, her friend Maura Casey remembered, in the midst of chaos, confusion and grief, Scott invited Casey’s 13-year-old daughter and her friends to her New London condominium for a cup of Irish tea to calm their nerves.

“She insisted that they continue to believe in the goodness of the world even when confronted with evil, Casey said. “She was an example to them.”

Scott and her son-in-law, David McCourt, helped develop a memorial garden at the Lyman Allyn Museum a year later in memory of Ruth, Juliana and all the victims of the attacks. The garden was dedicated in October 2002, and on Sunday Scott stood under one of the trees she helped plant then.

“I’m just so full of joy, happiness and peace,” she said at the beginning of her remarks.

David McCourt, who often spoke publicly about tolerance and empathy after the deaths of his wife and daughter and helped found an organization to teach nonviolence and conflict resolution to children, died in 2013.  

Scott, who now lives in Mystic and said she often visits the garden, gave permission to talk frankly about Sept. 11 to people who were uneasy about what to tell children who don’t remember the attacks 15 years ago.

“This is the right time to talk about what happened,” she said.

She also had advice for those not sure how to commemorate the anniversary of such a grave day in American history and her own life.

“Say, ‘have a grateful day,’” she advised. “I tell all of you, have a grateful day.”

U.S. Sens. Richard Blumenthal and Chris Murphy both spoke after Scott's remarks Sunday, as well as State Rep. Diana Urban, D-North Stonington, and Stonington First Selectman Rob Simmons, who was a congressman on the day of the attacks.

Casey, the former assistant editorial page editor of The Day, quoted a poem by Mary Oliver called "In Blackwater Woods": "To live in this world you must be able to do three things: to love what is mortal; to hold it against your bones knowing your own life depends on it; and, when the time comes to let it go, to let it go."

"The only thing in life more optimistic than Paula is a garden," Casey said, facing an enormous weeping willow that stands on the opposite end of the garden. "A garden will always, eventually, bloom again."

m.shanahan@theday.com