Dr. I: Brought to you live by ESPN
Idle Thoughts, while waiting for Santa, Odell Beckham Jr.'s next catch and for Rodney Purvis to make a jump shot:
• Dr. Idle, Dr. I to his close friends, is depressed.
Over the sad state of the writing business.
He could write 72 straight columns that win Pulitzers. Reaction: crickets.
Then the other night he gets an aggregate 30 seconds TV time seated next to Jim Calhoun (by complete happenstance) and his phone explodes.
OMG! You're on TV! You've made it!
(Sigh).
• That UConn home football schedule next season doesn't have Dr. I breathing into a brown paper bag.
Villanova, Army, Houston, Navy, East Carolina, South Florida.
Catch the fever.
• So let's see: The Red Sox decided to pay Sandoval and Ramirez, but not Jon Lester.
It turned out, as Dr. I's pal Mike Gianakos at Waterford High noted, that the Red Sox ultimately traded Lester - and prospects - for Rick Porcello.
• Note to Danny Ainge: really?
If you're going to trade Rondo, you must get what the Celtics lack - a proven wing scorer - in return.
Now they have 5-foot Jameer Nelson, two other guys from witness protection and more draft picks.
The Celtics have more draft choices now than the beer lineup at Buffalo Wild Wings.
So let's get more mediocre players.
Turrible, as Charles Barkley says.
• Some of these reader commenters.
Oy.
English teachers must weep.
• Dr. I and his cabinet have home run call suggestions for the great John Sterling.
We begin with Didi Gregorius.
The leader seems to be (sung to Manfred Mann) "Do Wah Didi Didi Dum Didi Do."
Although Middletown Press columnist Jim Bransfield prefers, "Holy (bleep). He actually hit a home run!"
• Fast fact: Penn State and the gutty, gritty, BC Eagles play in the only bowl game this season featuring both schools ranked in the top 25 for graduation rates.
So there.
• It bothers Dr. I that four nitwits voted Jameis Winston for the Heisman.
• Dr. I's pal Mike Scott shared the following fairy tale the other night at the postseason banquet for local football officials:
"A man proposes marriage to a woman. She refuses. The man sleeps late, watches sports and drinks beer. The end."
• So there were 50 seconds left in one of the state championship games. Shelton and Xavier tied at 21. Shelton on the 1-yard line. Shelton fumbles, Xavier eventually wins.
This from Xavier assistant principal David Sizemore (one of Dr. I's oldest friends):
"Just prior to the Shelton kid fumbling at the goal line," Dave wrote, "our student body recited the 'Hail Mary.' As God is my witness, I'm not making that up."
• Best dressed basketball staff in the ECC: Ledyard. It's not even close.
• Not that Dr. I is one of those he-told-you-so guys, but how's that decision to get rid of Bill Buscetto working out so far for St. Bernard?
• Why do people keep calling Mike Francesa?
• Congrats to the New London High School football team for its team grade point average of 3.18.
Dr. I seems to recall outrage over increasing the GPA requirement at New London.
Where are the doubters now?
This is the opinion of Day sports columnist Mike DiMauro.
Twitter: @BCgenius
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