On Wednesday, Oct. 2 as we watch the sun set, Jews around the world will welcome the Jewish new year, Rosh Hashanah 5785. The Jewish tradition is to eat foods that are symbolic of a sweet new year, including apples and honey. We bake round challah to remind us of the circle of life, the cycle of the year and the opportunity for new beginnings. Jewish people around the world will come together to celebrate and eat festive meals together.

But this year will be different from last year. Because Oct. 7 marks one year since the attack that has changed the course of Jewish history. One year since 1,185 Israelis were murdered. We witnessed 251 hostages dragged away from their homes and their families and their lives and taken into Gaza. One year since our sense of safety was shattered, our world was broken.

I spent that day trembling and scared. I prayed for the hostages to be released quickly and unharmed. And then a week went by, and they were still in the tunnels in Gaza. So I got on a plane to Tel Aviv so that I could visit with the families of the victims. I met women whose young husbands were ripped away from them. I embraced mothers who lost their teenage children at a concert. I cried with children who are now homeless orphans who lost their toys, stuffed animals and homes. I brought them the only thing that I could offer — a hug.

As I returned to Connecticut, I tried to get back to the rhythm of the new year. I wanted to organize fun gatherings for Hanukah, but we were still waiting. Still unable to enjoy life or smile or dance. Because our brothers and sisters were still being held captive. I could not imagine that a year would pass and so many hostages would remain in Hamas hands. I am devastated that Hamas continues to refuse ceasefire agreements, and that the region is so volatile.

As we continue to grieve and mourn, we are also watching in horror as antisemitism spreads like wildfire across Connecticut. Our synagogues, schools and playgrounds were desecrated with hateful symbols, and the unrest on college campuses made physical safety a constant concern for Jewish students.

I spoke around the region about the innocent victims I met. Then I worked with our Israeli emissaries to share their stories at schools and community gatherings. We invited a survivor from the Nova Festival to speak in Norwich, and we gathered together at Langley’s in Waterford with the Hostage Family Forum to raise awareness about the women and girls who were raped on Oct. 7. Together we collected funds for Israel to help stock medical supplies to first responders, provide food and shelter to the tens of thousands of displaced Israelis who have not been able to return home amid the war, and to start the slow process of rebuilding what was lost.

But we are not ready to celebrate the New Year. We are still grieving everyone that was lost this past year. Every day we hear new stories that make us cry even harder. So we are starting the new year by continuing to do what we’ve been doing for a year — writing letters, hanging up posters, wearing yellow ribbons and dog tags, lighting candles, leaving open seats at our holiday tables, and everything else that shows how much we need that piece of our own hearts that was taken from us to be restored.

This year I remember the innocent young adults who are missing from their families’ holiday tables. On Oct. 7 at 7:10 p.m., please pause and remember the hostages by leaving an empty chair at your table along with a plate of apples covered in honey in hope of a sweet new year.

Rachel Levy is the Executive Director of the Jewish Federation of Eastern Connecticut.