Keri Carter-Thomas is learning new details about her husband even though nine years have passed since he was gunned down while standing outside of Ernie's Cafe in New London, smoking a cigarette.

The widow of homicide victim Todd P. "T-Rek" Thomas, between working three jobs, has been attending the trial of his accused killers, Darius "P-Nut" Armadore and Gerjuan "Cali" Tyus.

A 36-year-old member of the Mashantucket Pequot tribe, Carter-Thomas sits with her in-laws in the courtroom and takes notes, struggling silently to absorb the sometimes shocking details of the double life her husband was leading in the weeks before his death on Dec. 23, 2006.

One recent morning, she chatted with a man she knew only as "Flex" as they walked into the Norwich courthouse together. To her surprise, Rashard Johnson turned out to be a key witness to a drive-by shooting her husband was involved in three weeks before he died. Carter-Thomas had never heard "Flex" was connected with the case, though she had spent time in the streets and bars of New London after the homicide, investigating the case on her own.

Carter-Thomas knew her husband had been cheating on her with a 19-year-old woman in the months leading up to his death - he had told her so and asked her to take him back - but it still hurt to hear the woman describe the relationship in open court.

"That whole thing hurt," Carter-Thomas said. "It was embarrassing."

Her husband had told her in the days before his death that people were after him, and she had told him to go to the police. She still regrets that on the night of his death she was upset with him and declined his invitation to go out. She had no idea he would go to Ernie's. She went out with friends and was in an elevator at Foxwoods when she got the call.

"They said he was shot, but I didn't know he was dead," she remembered.

Carter-Thomas appears stoic in the courtroom, but she quickly broke down during an interview between sessions last week.

"Even though I loved Todd, going through this trial, there's times I hate him," she said.

Carter and Thomas had married four years before his death and had two children together. Cameron, who is 10, looks just like his father, she said. Mylasia, 17, was named Miss Mashantucket for 2015-16 and is attending Central Connecticut State University. Thomas was also the father of Todd Thomas and Hydea Sebastian and was a father figure for Carter's oldest son, Kelcey Carter.

In Carter-Thomas' mind, there was a Todd Thomas and there was a T-Rek. She knew Todd Thomas, the suburban dad who was trying to do right by his family. This was the man who got the kids ready for school and went to parent-teacher conferences while she attended college and worked full time. This was the man who, she said, having grown up with two deaf parents, volunteered as a sign-language interpreter at Three Rivers Community College. This was the man who had just picked up a job delivering newspapers and who, at her request, had cut off his dreadlocks so he would look "more professional."

Within the same 6-foot, 6-inch frame was T-Rek, who never really got away from the streets of his native New London, who had been shot in the leg in 2000 during a drug turf dispute. His brother, John-John, was his "whole world," Carter-Thomas said, and it was that brotherly bond that police say led to T-Rek's death. John Thomas, high on PCP, had given Tyus two valuable gold necklaces, perhaps in an effort to settle a grudge. John Thomas was in prison when Todd Thomas, who was determined to get the jewelry back, died trying, according to police.

Called to the witness stand last week to tell his side of the story to the jury, John-John Thomas launched into an extended rant about civil rights and other topics and was forcibly removed from the courtroom.

"I wish he could have kept it together to do what should have been done," Carter-Thomas said.

Carter-Thomas is not expected to testify at the trial, though she said she wishes she could tell the jury how difficult it has been for her family.

"It hurts so bad," she said. "I wouldn't wish it on Cali and P-Nut's kids."

Of Tyus and Armadore, who have pleaded not guilty, she said, "I wish they would rot in hell."

The trial, Carter-Thomas said, is exactly what she needs.

"I just need closure," she said.

k.florin@theday.com