OK. This just in: I've never really absorbed golf. Not the concept necessarily. Chasing a little white ball through sand, water, woods and fescue (I love saying that word), especially on a nice summer day, beats a sharp pencil in the eye.

What frosts me is how seriously the game's advocates take themselves. As if its arcane rules came down from Mount Sinai. It's golf, people. Not the Beatitudes. I mean, since when did "replace all divots" take residence with "blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven?"

Know what else? This idea that golf — and country clubs — are of the male gland, for the male gland and by the male gland? It's so 20th century. Time to get with the times, gents. Besides, aren't some golf clubs called "Big Bertha" and not "Big Seymour?"

Please consider the aforementioned upon pondering the following news: Earlier this week, Muirfield, the world's oldest golf club located in Scotland, voted to admit female members for the first time in its 273-year history.

Two-hundred seventy-three years.

And I'm thinking: Geez, guys, so soon?

Now for the sad part. The Honourable Company of Edinburgh Golfers, which owns Muirfield, voted last May to retain the male-only policy. The result: Muirfield was removed from the rotation of courses that could host the British Open.

Hence, it required extortion for all the forward thinkers to rethink their policy.

Muirfield, based on its new vote and allegedly newfound chivalry, is back in the British Open rotation.

The new vote, or "second postal ballot," revealed that 80.2 percent of the voters supported admitting women, per published reports. The other 19.8 percent can be identified later this spring as the muttering misanthropes trying to improve their posture by walking around with their noses in the air.

"This is a significant decision for a club which was founded in 1744 and retains many of the values and aspirations of its founding members," Henry Fairweather, identified as the "club captain" said in published reports. "We look forward to welcoming women as members who will enjoy, and benefit from, the great traditions and friendly spirit of this remarkable club."

Oh, Henry.

Please.

Don't urinate on our shoes and tell us it's rain. Your fraternity is admitting women now as a necessary evil, its only path to regaining the British Open, thus proving extortion works.

Other published reports said The Royal and Ancient Golf Club at St. Andrews opened its membership to women in 2014 for the first time in 260 years. Royal St. George's and Royal Troon, two other British Open hosts, ended their male-only membership policies last year.

Sometimes you wonder: Is it really 2017?

And we think our country is screwed up? Sure, we have a president who may appoint a woman or two to his cabinet, but whose history suggests he sees women as nothing more than inflatable dolls in private. Sure, Augusta National took far too long (until 2012) to admit women as members, too. But at least we here in the United States can see the signs of the women's sports revolution.

In Connecticut, we have the UConn women, who have changed the way the country views women's sports. We pass the time during the summer at Mohegan Sun watching women play professional basketball. Locally, the girls' basketball team of New London High has become The Show at a school traditionally dominated by successful male sports.

All good. Signs of progress. Remember: direction, not speed. Forward is forward. Yet why do I get a nagging feeling of nausea at the idea these snooty, out-of-touch Scots did women a grudging favor for all the wrong reasons?

Here's hoping the first woman admitted to Muirfield adheres to the game's commandments. Play the ball as it lies, dammit. Can't have some skirt messing up what it's taken 273 years to perfect, right?

This is the opinion of Day sports columnist Mike DiMauro