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    Friday, April 26, 2024

    Dr. I has a simple request: Can Chapman mix in a strike, please?

    Idle Thoughts, while waiting for Aroldis Chapman to mix in a strike, football season to get here quickly and for a moratorium on the word "dude:"

    • Dr. Idle, Dr. I to his close friends, has a dilemma.

    His recent weight loss has earned him a new nickname.

    Local football official Jeff Clemens has decided Dr. I is no longer "the Round Mound of Pronoun," but rather the "Duke of Drivel."

    Which do you prefer?

    • Just thinking out loud here, but this guy Chapman is no Mo Rivera, you know?

    • Backing into parking spaces for no reason and thus delaying everyone behind you: Discuss.

    • Have to share this one:

    Summer league basketball the other night (and great work from Ledyard coach Dave Cornish for organizing) and a referee admonishes Mike Buscetto, who is coaching Waterford's team.

    Let's just say Buscetto was using five or six of George Carlin's "seven words you can't say on television."

    Buscetto glared at the ref suddenly started clapping his hands and yelling "swell job!" to his team, which cracked up everyone in the stands.

    • OK. So a few fathers in Waterford take the initiative to cut the infield grass on a baseball field or two in town.

    And then they get scolded by some town poohbahs for overstepping their bounds.

    How's this: Maybe if the grass was cut on time the fathers wouldn't have to?

    And that dark bank of lights at the high school baseball field is going to get fixed ... when?

    • A tip of the cap to Gregg Swanson, Scott Erricson and the other "Tour de Force" bike riders.

    Their fundraiser at Jonathan Edwards Winery the other night, to benefit their upcoming ride that honors the families of fallen police officers, was the social event of the season.

    And the band Sugar Rush: tremendous.

    Although Dr. I did have trouble finding his car at night's end.

    Can we, you know, add some street lights in No Sto to help a columnist out?

    • If actress Liv Tyler married former Philadelphia 76er World B. Free, divorced him for former Syracuse forward Louis Orr and then divorced him to marry former Auburn football coach Pat Dye, that would make her the New Hampshire state slogan.

    (Liv Free Orr Dye).

    • How did Dr. I manage to live so long without ever knowing about launch angle?

    • Note to the NFL: This potential one or two-game suspension for Ezekiel Elliott seems a splendid idea.

    Especially since the Giants open the season in Dallas.

    • Dr. I is very excited to be a caddy this year at Great Neck Country Club's Players' Championship.

    He'll be hauling clubs for his guy Matt Barnes.

    Matt and Dr. I will be available for pictures and autographs at the conclusion of the event.

    • Note to Gordon Hayward: Nice career so far. Irrelevant. Because it only counts with the Celtics.

    • Dr. I's pal John Fox, one of his besties from Boston College, reports that two of his children have interest in attending (sigh) Notre Dame.

    Dr. I is pleased to report that Fox refused to accompany them to South Bend on their visit.

    And that, friends, is like Nobel Prize worthy behavior, if you ask Dr. I.

    • Brian Cashman should give the Marlins anything they want for Justin Bour, the mammoth, lefty-hitting first baseman, who would hit 516 home runs at Yankee Stadium.

    • People who yell at their kids on the beach from 50 yards away, thus disturbing everyone else around them. Discuss.

    This is the opinion of Day sports columnist Mike DiMauro

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