Just like this year, May 24 was the Friday before Memorial Day weekend in 2019.

It was a sunny spring day with a long weekend in sight and summer break just around the corner for the five children of Jennifer Farber Dulos and Fotis Dulos.

It was also the day that the children’s lives changed forever, never returning to the steady routine they relied on.

The last sliver of their routine ended that morning when Farber Dulos made her usual drop-off at New Canaan Country Day School, expecting to meet the children at their grandmother’s apartment in Manhattan just a few hours later.

That morning, security cameras captured Farber Dulos’ black SUV pulling away from the elite private school. A neighbor’s camera caught another glimpse of her vehicle, headed toward the home the family of six rented on a cul-de-sac on Welles Lane in New Canaan.

After that, Farber Dulos was never seen again.

In March, Michelle Troconis, the former girlfriend of Farber Dulos’ estranged husband, was found guilty of conspiracy to commit murder after being charged with plotting with Dulos to kill his estranged wife as their custody battle and divorce dragged on. Dulos, who was charged with murdering his wife, died after attempting suicide in 2020.

Though evidence of Faber Dulos’ likely demise was found by investigators — a bloodied shirt and bra pulled from a Hartford trash can and blood spatter in a pickup truck and on the garage floor of her home — Farber Dulos’ remains were never found.

Farber Dulos was declared legally dead by a judge just last October. Though some of the questions that haunt Farber Dulos’ family have been answered, and some semblance of accountability has been found through the legal system, the family has never been able to lay her to rest beside her beloved father, Hilliard Farber, who died in 2017.

All hope is not lost

Farber Dulos’ best friend Carrie Luft still holds onto hope, albeit cautiously.

Luft, who has taken on the role as the Farber spokesperson since the early days of the investigation, said she still hopes they will find her friend.

“Finding her has come to feel like more of a long shot, or a hope, rather than a linear process,” Luft said. “In the earliest days of this case, it seemed entirely logical that she would be found.”

“Now that this time has passed, and a number of leads have been pursued to no avail, it feels more far-reaching,” Luft said. “But it does not feel impossible.”

As the anniversary of Farber Dulos’ disappearance approached this year, another date has also been creeping closer: Troconis’ sentencing on May 31.

“This milestone is compounded by the fact of sentencing being right around the corner as well,” said Luft.

Guilty verdict

On March 1, a jury found Troconis guilty of conspiracy to commit murder, tampering with evidence, conspiring to tamper with evidence and hindering the prosecution.

The verdict came after five weeks of evidence from state attorneys, who showed the jury mountains of evidence and called dozens of witnesses.

The evidence ranged from bloodied ponchos and zip ties pulled from red-tape sealed envelopes, surveillance videos of Dulos dumping trash bags into bins along Albany Avenue in Hartford as Troconis rode in the passenger seat, testimony from forensic experts about blood spatter and Farber Dulos’ DNA and hours of videos of Troconis being interviewed by police.

The prosecution’s case was followed by Troconis’ defense team, who adamantly maintained her innocence throughout the trial and hammered down the idea that Troconis was on trial for Dulos’ crimes.

In the courtroom, her lawyers argued that her different accounts of the day Farber Dulos disappeared, and Dulos’ whereabouts that morning, could be attributed to the effects of trauma, stress and bilingualism on memory.

Luft said that the experience of sitting through the trial listening to the testimony that described how the attack against her best friend likely played out and seeing a prosecutor hold up the stiffened, stained clothes she wore on the day of her dsiappearance was hard to put into words.

“It was just so completely different from anything I’ve ever experienced,”  Luft said. “It was without precedent, everything was just uncharted territory.”

When the jury came back with their verdict, Luft said the courtroom felt suspended in time.

“It was a very powerful experience to witness the gravity of a jury’s decision,” she said.

Their verdict, Luft said, was a moment of fleeting relief from the ongoing grief.

“It was certainly a relief, it was definitely the best possible outcome. I found it very validating to know that the jury saw and heard and experienced what we were also seeing, hearing and experiencing in that courtroom,” she said.

But Troconis’ sentencing will not mark the end of the legal battle in Farber Dulos’ case.

Troconis’ attorneys have already indicated that an appeal is in the works, and a co-defendant, Kent Mawhinney, is still awaiting trial.

Mawhinney, a former lawyer for Dulos, is also charged with conspiracy to commit murder in connection with Farber Dulos’ death. He is on the trial list, but a start date has not been set.

“That’s part of why, for us, none of this ever ends. The loss never ends. And the case itself just continues on. So there may be these moments, these milestones, decisions that resonate. But it all just keeps going,” Luft said. “That will just be another chapter.”

Legacy of love

In a recent interview with Connecticut news station WTNH, Farber Dulos’ mother, Gloria Farber, said her daughter left behind a legacy of love for her children.

“She amazed me, she always amazed me,” said Farber, who has custody of her five grandchildren.

Thinking back to May 24, 2019, Farber said she knew right away that Dulos was involved in her daughter’s disappearance. But she said she didn’t know what made the man she once called a son-in-law “just absolutely go off the rails.”

“How it happened is just so horrendous,” she said of her daughter’s death.

Farber, who testified in Troconis’ trial that she has not seen or heard from her daughter since May 24, 2019, also offered insight into how involved she thinks Troconis was in the crimes.

Speaking from her home in Manhattan, Farber said she thinks Troconis lied during the investigation and is still withholding information.

“I think she knows where Jennifer is,” she said. But Farber does not think Troconis will ever bring that information to light.

Throughout the ongoing investigations and court proceedings, Farber Dulos’ loved ones “always have Jennifer as a north star guiding decisions,” said Luft.

Farber Dulos’ patience, empathy, discipline and loyalty stays with them. Even in the hardest moments, Luft said her loved ones remember that their love for her is the reason they are all there.

“She is the common denominator, she’s always there in all these moments,” Luft said.

Farber Dulos’ best qualities have been instilled in those she loved and will carry on in her children: Her insatiable curiosity about the world, the delightful way she could find the humor in everything and laugh at the absurdity of everyday life and the fierce way she protected those she loved.

As Luft described the impact her friend had on all those who loved her, she struggled to find the words to measure the magnitude of the loss. It will always feel like a part of them is missing, Luft said.

“There is just always going to be a hole there or a lost limb,” she said.

In exactly one week from the anniversary of her disappearance, Farber Dulos’ loved ones will feel that familiar ache as they file into Stamford Superior Court for Troconis’ sentencing. They will take turns at a podium, imploring the judge to impose a particular sentence and describing the trauma they’ve endured since May 24, 2019.

“It definitely feels like it is a milestone, it’s a marker (in the) process. It will determine the immediate consequences of the guilty verdict and in that sense, it’s very important,” Luft said. “But at the same time, there is never going to be any closure.”

That court date, she said, will be just one more milestone in the journey none of them wish they were on. It will not bring healing, justice or closure, because nothing ever will.

“It’s both a marker and sort of a turning of a page but certainly not an end,” Luft said.