Reporters’ notebooks can be interesting things. Maybe not so much if you’re scribbling quotes in a one-on-one interview. But covering a live event or reviewing a performance? There are down moments and sometimes there’s stuff I jot down because it’s something funny or poignant or weird and I want to remember it later.

For example, last week, I covered the 16-band, long-day’s-journey-into-my-melted-brain hard rock/metal event called the Revolution Rock Festival at Foxwoods. And one thing I did was write down — without any intention to publish — the literal first thing out of the mouths of each band as they took the stage.

Because: Rock Dude stage banter is always predictable. David Lee Roth or Bono never bounded onstage and kicked off a show by crying, “We heard about your zoning board meeting last week, Des Moines!” or “We were talking on the bus, Kansas City, and we all agree your town has a lot of pretty fountains!”

No. Maybe that weirdo Michael Stipe utters something incomprehensible. “Why is everyone looking at me? I’m just an artist.” Otherwise,though, they all say some derivation of, “You ready to rock, (fill in town name)?”

Here, then — in conceptual hilarity — are the introductory remarks from each act on the Revolution Rock Festival bill.

1. Smashing Satellites: “Let’s make some noise!” (Or was it “noize”?)

2. Crobot: “Looking (F-expletive, adjectival form) beautiful, Revolution!”

3. Devour the Day: “Are you ready? I said, ARE YOU READY?!”

4. Anthrax: “C’mon (F-expletive, noun-form with maternal adjective in front)! Get up!”

5. Twelve Foot Ninja: “How you doin’, Connecticut? We’re Twelve Foot Ninja from Australia!”

6. Killswitch Engage: “Hey! Hey! Hey! Let’s have sex!”

7. Kyng: (Delivered in tentative manner, as though the singer was checking the condition of an elderly aunt): “Uh ... are you guys good? Good. So are we. We are Kyng from Los Angeles.”

8. Of Mice & Men: A 20-plus seconds howl.

9. The Amity Affliction: “How you doing?”

10. Chevelle: “You feelin’ good today, people?”

11. Nothing More: “Hello, Connecticut!!!”

12. Volbeat: “Are you ready?” Say yes! Yes! YES!”

13. Sevendust: “Let me see your (F-expletive, adjectival form) hands in the air! Do you know who we are?! We’re (F-expletive, adjectival form) Sevendust!”

14. Slayer: (After four songs) “Thank you very much. We’re gonna keep this simple. Thank you for showing up at this.”

15. Ghost: (After two songs, in Bela Lugosi/Dracula voice): “Good evening.”

16. Avenged Sevenfold: Okay, I didn’t actually hear what their dude said because I couldn’t get out of the Ghost throng in time. Probably something like, “Life is a pleasant garden of sweetness, people!!!”