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    Tuesday, May 14, 2024

    Tossing Lines: In golf, danger is par for the course

    Most people consider golf a peaceful sport for all ages, a gentle pastime to be safely played long into old age.

    I’ve been playing golf for a long time and, like many, in spite of close calls, I remain in stubborn denial. Truth be told, golf is outright dangerous.

    Golf Digest claims that 40,000 golfers are injured every year and, seeing spectators getting bonked on the head with balls during recently televised PGA golf tournaments, I was compelled to investigate the dangers of this reputedly peaceful past time.

    The first reported fatality from a golf ball occurred in 1632 in Scotland according to Paul Donnelley, author of “First, Lasts & Onlys of Golf.” But getting hit with a golf ball is only one of many dangers lurking among those beautiful landscapes.

    Self-inflicted injuries abound as pros and weekend hackers alike have shattered kneecaps and knocked themselves unconscious with errant shots off trees and rocks (PGA Tour pro Brett Ogle has done both).

    Golfers have accidentally stabbed themselves with broken clubs, some fatally, like 16-year old Jeremy Brenno of New York, who whacked his club on a bench, causing it to snap. A piece flew up and pierced his chest. Snopes.com lists several such fatal incidents.

    A New York legal website reports a Florida man was hitting balls on a driving range when one shot hit a granite marker on the tee area and ricocheted into his eye socket, causing serious injury.

    Golfers have been bitten by snakes and attacked by kangaroos and bears. On a Massachusetts golf course, a bear once lumbered out of the woods behind me.

    In warmer climates, alligators are a danger. One sunny day on Kiawah Island in South Carolina, I backed down a hill, snapping pictures around the driving range, where my daughter was warming up before a college tournament.

    Suddenly, a loud splashing occurred in a pond directly behind me as two alligators thrashed about. Sprinting from gnashing teeth, I turned to see 12 more alligators lining the shore of the pond, basking in the sun.

    I’ve stumbled upon alligators hiding in the reeds while looking for my ball. Golfers poking around ponds have been killed by alligators. So far, I’m not one of them.

    People drown in water hazards. One legendary golf tale tells of a gentleman who angrily threw his bag of clubs into a pond before remembering that the bag held his car keys. He dove in after them and never came out. They found him tangled in weeds on the bottom.

    Lightning is a well-known hazard of the game, but there’s also the unexpected and bizarre.

    In 1996, the Irish Times reported that a golfer in Ireland entered a drainage ditch to retrieve his ball when a rat ran up his trouser leg. In the ruckus that ensued, the rodent emptied his bladder on the golfer’s leg. Two weeks later, he (the golfer) entered the hospital severely jaundiced. Shortly thereafter, he died from kidney failure.

    I was recently hit with a golf ball struck by my own wife. This was no doubt in retaliation for an incident a few weeks prior when I almost clocked her with my drive as she walked ahead of me toward the ladies tee. The bag she was pushing stopped the ball dead, cutting short my drive, to my considerable annoyance.

    I have a tee time for this weekend but, all things considered, maybe I should cancel.

    Nah, it’s not that dangerous.

    John Steward lives in Waterford. He can be reached at tossinglines@gmail.com or visit www.johnsteward.online.

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