Stormy Daniels keeps her clothes on at Mohegan Sun
Stormy Daniels, headlining at the Comix Roadhouse at Mohegan Sun on Wednesday night, made her ongoing transition from stripper/porn star to stand-up comic a prominent part of her new routine.
She noted that she was wearing, uncharacteristically, underwear and a dress with a zipper in the back.
"It's hard not to be rolling on the floor and touching myself," she said, adding, "they won't even give me a pole." Her microphone was bedecked with prominent sequins, she said, so she would be sure not to put it in her mouth.
I went to see Stormy because, well, she's a piece of modern American history I might someday be able tell the little tikes about around the fire, an icon of the Trump era. Well, maybe not the little ones.
John Kennedy had his film star, Marilyn Monroe. Bill Clinton had his intern, Monica Lewinsky. Donald Trump has a porn star, Stormy, to whom he paid hush money.
Besides, Wednesday's Stormy show seemed more wholesome to me than the choreographed Connecticut Port Authority show I saw the night before, with its chorus of politicians shamelessly singing for the money-makers and their lobbyists. The port authority had hush money offers, too, but couldn't pull them off.
There is a lot of news ahead for both the Trump-paying-Stormy scandal, the subject of a New York criminal investigation, and the port authority scandals, the subject of multiple ongoing investigations and audits.
Let me say up front that it's hard to quote Stormy without including the F bomb. To make this easy, let's just shorten it to F. Almost all of the jokes are about sex.
"I am old as F," she says early on, talking about her transition from sex worker to comic. "Stripper years are like dog years."
Telling the story of how she once fell in the shower, carefully shaving her private parts, she exclaimed: "F HD video."
Claiming a clean bill of personal health, she told the audience that workers in the adult industry are tested every 14 days.
"I am cleaner than that chair you are sitting on, or any doorknob you touched today," she said.
At the outset of the show, the audience is asked to fill out index cards with questions they'd like Stormy to answer. I took that opportunity to go chat with a guy nearby dressed in Stormy drag.
Bill wouldn't give me his last name when I introduced myself as a reporter from The Day, but he let me take his picture, including the wavy blonde wig and fake boobs actually signed by Stormy after one of her strip shows.
He also had a rolled-up copy of Forbes magazine with Trump on the cover, the same one she says Trump spanked her with in their now-infamous encounter.
Stormy calls the Trump encounter the "90-second unfortunate incident that redefined my existence."
A lot of audience questions Wednesday were about Trump. Asked whether he said anything during their encounter, she said he may have muttered "Putin" at the critical moment. Asked about his size, she said his ego is enormous and you'll have to buy her book to learn more.
Asked who she supports in the current presidential race, she says she's not used to being questioned, as a sex worker, about her political opinions.
"If you want to know about anal positions, I've got you," she said.
The turnout for Stormy on Wednesday was sparse. But it was an enthusiastic crowd. She has great stage presence, good timing and is smart and canny enough to be fast on her feet.
The warm-up act, called her "fluffer," was so bad it was a great relief when Stormy finally stepped on the stage. The whole act could use professional polishing but has a lot of potential.
Many people seemed to be there for the same reason I was, with not much interest in her taking her clothes off.
"Thank you for coming out with the truth about Trump. We thank you," was one of the questions Stormy read from the audience's index cards.
They broke into the most hearty round of applause of the night.
This is the opinion of David Collins.