Jeffrey Ross is the toast of the roast

April 01, 2011 12:00 am • Last Updated: April 01, 2011 3:01 pm

By By KRISTINA DORSEY Day Arts Editor

Jeffrey Ross hosts a Comedy Central roast.

You wanna roast somebody? Somebody like David Hasselhoff or Joan Rivers or Pamela Anderson? Well, Jeffrey Ross is your guy.

The comic has hosted so many roasts that he's become known as the Roastmaster General.

His latest such gig was the Donald Trump skewering on Comedy Central, where "Jersey Shore's" The Situation bombed in spectacular fashion (more on that later).

Ross even brings a bit of roasting to his stand-up gigs, as he will Saturday at the Mohegan Sun Cabaret Theatre. He asks audience members to volunteer to some "speed roasting," where they're the focus of Ross's insult-happy comedy for 15 seconds.

Ross - whose 2009 book is titled "I Only Roast the Ones I Love" - took some time last week to talk about all things comic.

When The Situation was getting booed at the Trump roast, Ross tried to quell the unamused-crowd unrest. He told the audience to let The Situation do his thing and then bared his own not-so-tight abs. As for what he was thinking as he saw The Situation flailing away, Ross says:

"I was thinking, 'Please don't cause a riot,' and I just didn't want the place to collapse into anarchy. So I just tried to do my duty as roastmaster general and save the Situation situation. ...

"I was coming up later, and my buddies were going to go on, and I didn't want the crowd to get restless, so I stepped in and just tried to calm things down. ...

"When people bomb at a roast, it's always uncomfortable. It's nothing I want to watch. But it kind of proves that these roasts are best handled by pros. This is like the Super Bowl of comedy. As soon as you throw an amateur on the field, it can get really precarious."

What's the secret is to doing roasts well, since he's perfected the art?

"I appreciate that, but I feel like this is an art that has been going on 100 years. Or probably a billion years. People have been busting each other's (for a family newspaper, we'll sub in the word "chops" here) since the dawn of time. This is just something I latched onto. I think the secret is to do it out of affection and not out of a vendetta. You don't want to be an angry roaster. I like being a sweet roaster."

It seems as though a lot of comedians - like Ross - come from New Jersey. Is that just a coincidence?

"I think it's inevitable. New Jersey is the recipient of every joke. We have very thick skin in New Jersey, and consequently, everyone in New Jersey thinks they're a roaster. We're constantly making fun of each other and the world. By our nature, we're

outsiders. All our TV and radio stations come in from New York, all our sports teams are New York teams. We're a living insult. It's like ever since Sully landed his plane on the Hudson River to avoid New Jersey ..."

How he became a roastmaster:

"I got a call in 1995, I think it was, to roast Steven Siegel. I guess they couldn't get anybody, because they got to me and I'd never done one before. I went into the Museum of Broadcasting, and I looked up how these roasts work. This was before you could Youtube and Google. I did some research, and I talked to some older comedians. I got a feel for the affectionate sort of angle of roasting the ones you loved. I liked it right away. I didn't care about Siegel, but I got really a kick out of making fun of and improvising with Milton Berle and Buddy Hackett and Henny Youngman, who were all there."

What he learned from those legends:

"Well, Milton gave me some great advice that night. Afterward, he said, 'Do less jokes. They only remember the home runs.' I try to live by that now. You don't have to talk all day. Just give them the best jokes you think of and get off."

In his live shows, Ross roasts audience members who volunteer for the honor:

"At a certain point in my show, I invite anyone who wants to come onstage for a speed-roasting round. It's 15 seconds of pain if you can handle it. ...

"It always ends with a big, loving round of applause, but I am swinging for the fences. Once you're onstage, you're fair game. I think people want it full throttle. I think people don't want me to hold back. The fun part is using the audience in an interactive, fun way. It's like 'Let's Make a Deal' with insults."